If you’re in need of a pick-me-up, these funny life quotes will put a smile on your face and may even draw out a laugh. Turn your day around with these important quotes on life 🙂
For a boost of inspiration, take a look at these motivational quotes.
That moment in an argument when you realize you’re wrong
“Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.”
— anonymous
Funny life quotes about indecisiveness
“Hold on, I’ve gotta overthink about it.”
— anonymous
Just keep trying and maybe you’ll succeed
“Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet. No one really knows how.”
— anonymous
All three are important, but the funny bone especially
“To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.”
—Reba McEntire
Wise words from Ellen DeGeneres
“Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.”
― Ellen DeGeneres, Seriously… I’m Kidding
Funny life quotes that puts things into perspective
“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
― George Carlin
When nothing surprises you at this point
“I am presently experiencing life at a rate of several WTFs per hour.”
— anonymous
When people try filling your mind with their opinions and ideas
“The trouble with having an open mind is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.”
— Terry Pratchett
Bad decisions are a necessary part of life
“Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions.”
― Mark Twain
You won the race
“When you feel worthless, remember you were once the quickest sperm cell.”
— anonymous
When you speak before you think
“Some things are better left unsaid. Which I generally realize right after I have said them.”
— anonymous
When your mind won’t turn off before bed
When you’re trying to sleep, but your brain decides to take a trip down memory lane and remember every stupid decision you made in your life.
― anonymous
Maybe it’s time to let your brain take the driver’s seat
“I’m no longer following my heart. That bitch gives bad directions.”
― Fuckology
The irony of this realization
“That awkward moment when you’re wearing Nike’s and you realize you can’t do it.
— anonymous
When your actions are “justified”
“Two wrongs don’t make a right, but they make a good excuse.”
— Thomas Stephen Szasz
You go to the store for one thing and come out with more than you bargained
“The odds of going to the store for a loaf of bread and coming out with only a loaf of bread are three billion to one.”
― Erma Bombeck
For some strange reason, this one really hit me
“A giraffe’s coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself.”
— anonymous
Google becomes your best friend when you need help
“So it turns out being an adult is mostly just googling how to do stuff.”
— anonymous
At least you’ll have reliable results by the end
“I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, you know, just to be sure.”
— anonymous
Funny life quotes about online shopping
“The worst part about online shopping is having to get up and get your card out of your handbag.”
— anonymous
The hypocrisy of this statement…
“Everything is funny as long as it’s happening to somebody else.”
― Will Rogers
Indecisiveness truly sucks
“Be decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road of life is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.”
— anonymous
The life of an adult
“I’ve reached that age where my brain goes from “You probably shouldn’t say that,” to “What the hell, let’s see what happens.”
— anonymous
All the Netflix-bingers out there are definitely well-viewed
“If you read a lot of books, you’re considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you’re not considered well-viewed.”
― Lily Tomlin
The life of an introvert
“Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.”
― Criss Jami, Killosophy
How life works
I came. I saw. I made it awkward.
― Unknown
Cinderella? Is that you?
Life is not a fairytale. If you lose your shoe at midnight, you’re drunk.
― Unknown
When you could use an adult adult
I’m an adult but more like an adult cat… Like someone should probably take care of me but I can also sorta make it on my own.
― Unknown
The life of a college student
College was like a four-year game show called ‘Do My Friends Hate Me or Do I Just Need to Go to Sleep?’.
― John Mulaney
At least something positive is coming out of your insomnia
Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.
― Unknown
Weird conversations with your bestie must never see the light of day
Having those weird conversations with your friend and thinking, “If anyone heard us, we’d be put in a mental hospital.”
― Unknown
Siblings tell each other everything. Never expect a secret to stay a secret.
When I say I won’t tell anyone, my sister doesn’t count.
― Unknown
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